A successful life

A bubble of thought floats into the air,
trapped by the low reachable ceiling of the room.
It lingers in the constrainted,
suffocated by that thin layer of vacuum,
keeping me wide awake,
as i wondered and pondered...

What exactly is a successful life?

At the end of my journey, as i lay there, awaiting for the shivering cold embrace of death's own hands, what will be my state of mind at the last few moments of my time? will i step into the gates of heaven or hell with a subtle smile off the side of my pale pink lips, or end up with a frown on that old wrinked face with both ends of my lips facing southwards. As my eyelids are put to rest for the last time, would i be satisfied with the way i had pursued my life? would i step into the treacherous flames of death leaving behind not only the ashes of time but regretful regrets?

I do believe that in some time of our lives, earlier or later, the question of 'My Life' would definitely pop up, as we playback the past of our lives like an overhead projector in the walls of our mind and ponder on the 'been-there, done-thats' and the 'should-haves'.

If i could, i would.
If i could live a life without any regrets, i would.
If i could live life to the fullest, i would.
If i could live a life which i am proud of, i would.
If i could be the man i was to be, i would.
If i could be the husband, father, son and friend i seek to be, i would.
If i could find the courage and strength to do all that i could, i would.
In the end of my day, i do wish that for all the 'I Could's , i would have had.

Like a pheasant trapped in the mind of a prince,
i am a walking twirl of confusion.
I seek a life with all the riches without the rags,
with all the love without the hurt,
and simplicity of life that comes without burden
Yes, in this part of my utopia,
what i wish to have,
i wish to share,
not with the masses,
but the privilege of the ones i care.

Waking up every morning to the one i love,
spending every precious moment of this short-lived journey through life with her,
without any of life's burdens weighting on us,
the magnitude of our love shielding us against everything else,
but the simple gratitude of being destined to be together,
as we cherished and ravished every single moment in time,
with our hearts connected in the unfathomed caves of the ocean bed,
undisturbed by the gushing of the treacherous waves above,

In the tireless pursue of a life without regrets,
i seek to be the faithfully departed,
leaving behind not only my legacy,
but the fruits of labour of my love to the ones i left behind,
bringing with me nothing more,
but only the tender cherished memories of my life,
the sweet reminisces of every single day that we had spend together,
as i paddle my way into the burning flames
that flickers through that small open window,
with that smile from my pale cold lips.

A felicitous end to my successful life.
My last words being,
Au revoir, mon amour